"So Why Do This?"

After the list of the changes that I'll have to make, some people may be wondering, "So Why Do This?" Oh, there are so many reasons! How much time do you have? LOL Here's a few:

1. I have an aneurysm in my ascending aorta (currently minor but still a terrifying prospect) and it would be better for me if I can keep my blood pressure under control (something that's easier to do when you're not drastically overweight)
2. I have hypertension
3. I have PCOS
4. I have insulin resistance (common w/PCOS)
5. I look in the mirror and the body I see does not reflect the person I am (and I hate it!)
6. My joints hurt from the excess weight and I'm in pain (granted, usually minor) all the time
7. I have tried literally everything to lose weight - up to and including Dr. Rx'd medication - and I've only lost 25 lbs.  That's less than 10% of my body weight.
8. I've seen first hand what years of obesity does to a person's quality of life (my mom)
9. One of my best friends from high school died 4 years ago at the age of 35 from a heart attack secondary to obesity
10. I want to have children and getting pregnant at my current weight with my current health conditions is dangerous, foolish, and dangerous.

I could go on, but that's a good start. I'm sure you get the picture.

None of these things really answers the question, though, does it? And it's such as simple question! It was posed to me the other day by my friend D and I found myself meandering through the above list, the science of how the surgery changes your body (pretty cool stuff if you're a geek like me), how the weight loss will positively impact the health issues I'm dealing with, and how I really want to have children and to do so at my weight is akin to sending out an engraved invitation to eclampsia and gestational diabetes. But again....does any of this actually answer the question? Not so much.

There's really only one simple, cohesive, coherent answer I can give: It's the best decision I can make for my health. Sure, there are loads of factors that went into making that decision but at the end of the day all that really matters is that I know I'm making the right decision for me and my life.

The Easy Way

While I thankfully have a life full of supportive, loving, people I have occasionally heard comments (not directed at me - even obliquely - but  in social situations and from a few people in university classes) that surgery is the "easy way" to lose weight. To all those people I say: You can salt and pepper my ass and prepare to bite me.

There is absolutely nothing easy about making the decision to put yourself under the surgeon's knife, knowing full well that you will never eat or drink like you used to again. That bears repeating: There is absolutely nothing easy about making the decision to put yourself under the surgeon's knife. Regardless of the reasons or the benefits.

(Notice I don't say that I'll never eat and drink "normally" because, in fact, after healing from the bypass surgery the eating I'll be doing is far closer to "normal" than how I've ever eaten before.) I'm rather looking forward to it, if I'm being honest. Not so much the surgery, or the pain, or the swelling, or the fatigue, or the IVs (ick! I hate the way the IV catheter feels in my arm!), or the liquid diet for 2-4 weeks afterwards...none of that. But I'm looking forward to being more comfortable in my own skin. To not feeling like I'm fighting with my body for every ounce I manage to lose - because that's basically what losing weight with PCOS is like. It's like being Maltese during the seige of Malta while being attacked by the Turkish empire. Hopelessly outgunned and laughably undermanned. In a word: Screwed. Yeah, I'm looking forward to being able to eat reasonable portions, exercise like a human being, and lose weight. Yanno....like "normal" people. There's that word again.

Which leads me to my next bit of business: The weight I am currently. I haven't mentioned it, have I? Hm. Well, no time like the present to come out of the obesity closet.

Height: 5'7"
Highest Weight: 347.8
Highest BMI: 54.5
Current Weight: 328.6
Current BMI: 51.5

Current Measurements: Bust: 53", Waist: 47" Hips 58", R Thigh: 35"

There we go! How's that for the ugly truth of the matter?

I start the pre-op diet on Wednesday (right before Thanksgiving!), so I'll have to wait and see what changes with these numbers between starting the diet and the date of surgery.